2truths 1 lie. The answers

1. I've had 2 close shaves with jail time. Both as a result of sex.

This is true.

I was 18. They were 17. The first one was a virgin or so she said. I only found out after we had slept together on the day that we met. So I was a little skeptical, but I accepted it. But when I didnt want to be in a relationship with her she started acting out. One day she called me and she was crying on the phone. Then a mans voice came on the phone.

YOU FUCKED MY DAUGHTER?? YOU SON OF A BITCH!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU COCKSUCKER. MY BROTHER'S A COP AND WE'RE GONNA COME OVER THERE AND HAUL YOUR ASS OFF TO JAIL. SHE'S ONLY 17 YOU KNOW. A MINOR. THAT'S STATUTORY RAPE. YOU'RE GOING TO PRISON BUDDY

Then his brother comes on the phone.

What's you address?

*Click*

Man hell no. I turned my phone off, got on my knees and prayed. Hard.

The second one was a bit more comical. I went to pick up this girl from her parents house. I was driving uninsured, as most of us Nigerians tend to do at some point. She gave me head as I drove. Always a pleasure. We got to our "spot" and I parked, we got into the backseat and proceeded to do the nasty.

Woop woop

Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit. We put our clothes back on in record time

*knock knock* License and registration please

Now in the state of Michigan, if you dont have insurance, your registration is revoked. So I gave him my license and my expired registration card and tried to feign ignorance .

So uh, what u kids doing out here. this time of night? he said. Cocked eyebrow, stern voice

Just driving, getting some air *gulp*

Right, did you know your registration has been revoked? They always ask "did you know" knowing that you know, I didnt know. Or at least that's what I told him. He didnt believe me. He knew I knew he didnt believe me.

Ma'am, can I see some ID?, he looks at the girl in the back with her panties around her ankes, clad only in my jacket

I dont have any on me.

How old are you ma'am?

Seventeen

Really?

Shit shit shit SHIIIIT'!! omo girl yi, lie now

He walked away to talk to his partner for a few minutes and came back after what seemed like years to say

I'm going to let you go this time. Go straight home and park the car and make sure you fix the insurance on this first thing tomorrow morning. And you know she's not legal age. Dont let us catch you sneaking into the woods again. Goodnight!

I jejely went and dropped homegirl at her house, went back to mine, snuck in and prayed a prayer of thanksgiving. A friend of mine had just got thrown in jail for similar stuff the previous month...I was shitting bricks. Funny, both these girls had the same name. I should prolly stay away from girls with that name

2. I once got so drunk, I stripped off naked and did jumping jacks in front of all the people on my floor in uni halls. About 15 of them. Male and female

This is false. I wasn't drunk. The rules of truth or dare are clear. First day at Ann Arbor State College. I was a dumb 17 yr old kid, with my first ever taste of freedom. We were all getting to know each other. There was no alcohol because no one had yet figured out how to sneak it onto campus for a bunch of minors. We were bored, so we started playing games. At least 5 people stripped to their birthday suits. Including this pretty little girl I dared. She had a tattoo of a rose on her right butt cheek...or was it a heart...not sure now. But anyway, she dared me right back. I couldnt say no now, could I?

3. I lost my virginity at age 11

This is true. Unfortunately all of you who classed me as an agbero are correct. She was our 17 yr old neighbours daughter. She came over all the time, or I went over to hers. One day we watched a movie with some nudity and sexual content. By the time it was over, I had a suspicious bulge in my pants. I matured early. ;-P. She glanced at it, then at me

So do you like what they did in the movie?

A very shy Yes

Do you want to try it?

I looked at her. She was smiling at me.

Yes.

Ok. She took her clothes off and lay back on the couch.

I stared for a full minute. I had never seen real live boobies before! I climbed on top of her an proceeded to suck them dry.

After about 10 minutes sucking, pressing, squeezing, she goes.

Aren't you going to put it in?

Put what in?

You know, like in those blue films you watch.

Shit! how did she know about my stash?

She smiled to calm me down. Its ok, just put it in.

So I did, and came spectacularly quickly. She chuckled.

Not to worry, you'll be better next time. Come by tomorrow

And we went on like that for 2 years, then we moved. And it was to be another 7 years before I would taste the sweet nectar of love again.

So yes, AfroBabe, No limit and theicequeen were right. Lady Koko, sorry babe

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