And you thought I was bad (Introducing MDD)

MDD aka Mu'fuggin Dead Dog n.


check out the definition of that at Urban Dictionary proposed by Yours Truly. :)

And you guys thought I was bad. Meet MDD...my brother from another mother. He lives in Nig at the moment. Just graduated from LAG.

His back story: we went to high school together. he could safely be described as a "bolo" back then. After high school, I went to the US and he stayed put. I went to visit a year and a half later and dude was running things. A smoking hot girlfriend, a drop dead gorgeous piece on the side and pretty much a choice of whatever girl he wanted in LAG.

Mehn, I was jealous o! Me I was still managing one girl at the time. Casual, but since I still knew nothing about talking to chicks, it was all I was getting. I wanted to stay in gidi and learn under his tutelage. But gats to go back to school, so I left. That was January 2004

Since then I hadn't been back to Nig and finally went December '08, nearly 5 years later. The day I met up with MDD, he was like a crack addict suffering from withdrawals, furiously dialling, calling his boys trying to get a girls number, any girl, just to call her...and maybe arrange something. You see, it turns out MDD had bitten off a little more than he should have. He had by then, slept with pretty much every girl in Lag(well the ones that he was interested in). And those he hadn't knew enough of his story to stay far, far away from him. So obviously, he wasnt going to be able to hook me up with any "shigs" as he had so eloquently promised. Good thing I'd made my own arrangements.

Hanging out with him that day was nothing short of amusing. He finally got some chicks number from our other friend, Teejay. Her name was Nnena. He called her, totally out of the blue, she was at work, he arranged to meet her after work. She agreed. (I should point out that MDD is a very smooth operator, he is also the funniest man I know, so I wasnt surprised she was willing). She was on the island. We were in Yaba, but it was still a couple of hours before closing time so we chilled.

I borrowed MDD's car and went to visit my friend TDVA. I say 'visit', I mean seduce. It didnt work that day...well, it might've but for extenuating circumstances. She had a trip to prepare for and about 10minutes in MDD was blowing up my phone.

Where are you? We have to go, you know what traffic getting to the island is like.

So I hugged the deliciously sexy TDVA (and her double dees) adieu, under the watchful, menacing eyes of her brothers and me and MDD drove the roughly 30mins to the island(he did it in about 20--i forgot what a menace young nigerians were on the road). There was no traffic, so we were early. We sat to wait.

About 5 minutes in, a girl walked past the car; we didnt see her face, but MDD was very impressed with her booty. Booty is about 20% for me, if she doesnt have a pretty face....well, I wont say. But she had a nice ass, and a pretty average walk. A few minutes later she walked back past us. She had just gone to a kiosk to buy some gum. I saw her face this time. She was beautiful.

Do you think that's her? MDD was excited now

I dunno, maybe. Call her.

So he did, looking back at her the whole time. She picked up. His end of the conversation is what I heard but I imagine it went something like this.

Hey.

Hi, are you here?

I think you just walked right past me. You're wearing a shirt and black trousers right?

Yea, did you see me?

Yes I'm in the blue 307.

She walked up to the car smiled at us. She had a gorgeous, confident smile, with tiny dimples. I was impressed, I might just move in. After some initial hesitation, she got in the car and we went to a looking for a place to eat.

Over the course of the evening, I learned several things.

• She had a boyfriend, who knew she was out with us. He obviously didnt know what he was doing


• She had also, even though she had never stepped foot in Lag, heard about MDD. She knew his story well. Two of her friends had fallen to his charms.


• I'm not averse to stealing a girl who my best friend is interested in if she shows an interest in me


• Neither is he


• MDD is very selective about the women he dates, as am I.


• 9ja food at a posh restaurant is f**king expensive


• If I went to live in Nig today, Nnena would be my girlfriend...unless TDVA's available of course.

MDD is planning on coming to England for his masters this year. I cant wait. Me, him, and PhatAl...three musketeers, reunited. Taking the United Kingdom by storm.

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