Reverse Beer Goggle Retina Replacements

...For the woman who just isn't taking any chances.

So you just got married, or you just got into a serious relationship. He's smart, funny, good looking, successful, loves you completely and he's a s faithful as he can be. And you love him more than you thought you could ever love a human being. He's "The One".

But he's still a man. And as long as there are pretty girls out there, you cannot be a 100% sure he won't wander. The XY chromosome in him has programmed his eyes to follow every long legged, smooth skinned, large breasted, badoonk-bearing woman they rest on and then it becomes a battle between his love for you and that thing that dangles between his legs. And let's face it, these days, your odds aren't great.

That's where we come in.

The Reverse beer goggle retina implants are engineered to make every woman that isn't you appear remarkably less attractive than she really is. Very much the opposite of the effect beer/beer goggles have.

Just think. When your man says "You're the most beautiful woman in the world", he will actually mean it. And not that rubbish cliché "mean it because I love you so much" but he'll mean it because its the only truth he knows.

So get him in today. It just might be the best decision you ever make.

Side Effects include:

-Him wondering why your daughter is so damn butt ugly

-A change in his perception of beauty if he's susceptible to pop culture

-Oily discharge (ok we're kidding about that one)

-Blindness

Available now.

Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

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