so anyway...(my excuses)

after the"Awesome", things quieted down a little, with the odd fling here and there, but nothing too serious; I had exams coming up, a neglected dissertation due and not a lot of time for nookie. Then everything was said and done, i had handed in my half-assed attempt at a dissertation and I moved out of my flat, sublet it and moved back in with the parents over the summer and worked to save up mula for my move to london...so i had a boring, poon lacking summer. :(

Then I moved to London. Oh the promise of beautiful, cultured, sophisticated(read sexually deviant) southern women with sexy accents had me almost filling my boxers with joy. Needless to say, the reality didnt live up to the fantasy, disappointing.

I have two roomates, a girl (call her Pat 22) and a guy (call him Frankie, my age, 24). Both are in long term relationships (4 and 5 years respectively). And I'm the (un)lucky b*st*rd who doesnt have a significant other. So, inevitably, i'm under constant "encouragement" to find a nice girl and settle down; mostly from Pat and sometimes from Frankie....i think they're just jealous :)

Of course, I apply counter pressure on Frankie, "c'mon man, u've been in a relationship practically as long as you've known what to do with ur d*ck". I need a wingman...

Anyway, this is the argument I throw back at them:

I'm 24 years old and according to the Standard Creepiness Rule , my dating pool consists of 19-34 year olds only.

-Most women my age, i.e. 22-25 yr olds, are looking for ready-to-propose-marriage 27-30 year old men. So that rules them out. Or rules me out depending how you look at it.

-19-21 year olds are, well, drama. This is a very weird age for a female. Caught between trying to hold on to their girlhood while at the same time having to embrace the responsibility of womanhood. Still learning the proper way to "handle" men. its fine if you've been in a relationship with a girl and you grow together through this period, but starting to get involved with her at this stage is like antagonizing a wounded lioness. I dont fancy getting eaten alive tyvm(thank you very much).

-That leaves me with 25-34 year olds, and they're split into two distinct groups; confident, strong, established, independent women (my favorite kind) who are as happy single as they would be if they were getting married tomorrow...and desperate, marriage obsessed women with outstretched ring fingers.

Now, I accept that this is a bit of an over-generalisation and there are exceptions to the rule, but in my general experience, this is truth.

So, yes, I'm a happily single nomad for the moment. But any exceptional women from groups A and B are welcome to apply...and any woman from group C is particularly welcome. Yes I have a thing for older women :)

Stay sexy, in and out of bed

The Bachelor

Related Posts :